Friday, April 01, 2005
blogger sucks
What is the deal with all these Blogger problems lately? Rich Miller over at Capital Fax jumped ship because of them; Ann Althouse wrote a big blog about how much trouble they've been. When will it be fixed?
Rule of Three or Four
I just found out that comedian Mitch Hedberg died yesterday ostensibly from a heart problem. They don't know if drugs were involved. He was born with a heart problem and had a lot of anxiety over it, the news said. He was arrested in Austin for heroin possession two years ago. I wonder how he escaped prison.
He was hilarious. John Knowles told me about him a couple years ago. Great delivery. Here's one of my favorite Hedberg bits:
"I think Pringles' initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But Pringles is a laid back company. They said 'Fuck it. Cut em up.'"
He was hilarious. John Knowles told me about him a couple years ago. Great delivery. Here's one of my favorite Hedberg bits:
"I think Pringles' initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But Pringles is a laid back company. They said 'Fuck it. Cut em up.'"
Monday, March 28, 2005
A Boy's Wetdream, Circa 1958
Yesterday it seems that Michael Jackson called in to Jesse Jackson's radio show, and though he didn't talk about specifics of the case, he nonetheless proclaimed his innocence. It seems to me that a gag order means he can't even do this.
Regardless of whether he violated the gag order by talking publicly at all, Michael had some weird things to say, as usual.
My all-time favorite was when he -- in very much a nonsequitur -- said that he's a poor eater; he doesn't very much like to eat. So much that Elizabeth Taylor used to hand feed him. Now the images this admission conjures are priceless, and would make for an incredible SNL skit with the right actors doing extreme caricatures. Think of the a five-course meal where she spoons the soup into his mouth like he's in a high-chair with a bib. Think of the steak she cuts up into small pieces and gingerly places into his mouth. Think of the pudding course where she scoops a tasty tapioca into her palm and holds for him to eat up like a pie-eating contest at the fair. And don't forget how she feeds him his Arnold Palmer by forming her hand into a bowl and having him lap it up like a newborn kitten. Think of the upper-arm strength she must have to do this.
Just imagine this lunacy. It's maybe the funniest thing I've seen in my head all year. Brilliant!
Regardless of whether he violated the gag order by talking publicly at all, Michael had some weird things to say, as usual.
My all-time favorite was when he -- in very much a nonsequitur -- said that he's a poor eater; he doesn't very much like to eat. So much that Elizabeth Taylor used to hand feed him. Now the images this admission conjures are priceless, and would make for an incredible SNL skit with the right actors doing extreme caricatures. Think of the a five-course meal where she spoons the soup into his mouth like he's in a high-chair with a bib. Think of the steak she cuts up into small pieces and gingerly places into his mouth. Think of the pudding course where she scoops a tasty tapioca into her palm and holds for him to eat up like a pie-eating contest at the fair. And don't forget how she feeds him his Arnold Palmer by forming her hand into a bowl and having him lap it up like a newborn kitten. Think of the upper-arm strength she must have to do this.
Just imagine this lunacy. It's maybe the funniest thing I've seen in my head all year. Brilliant!
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