It's 2:30 on Friday night and I am watching one of my favorite movies on HBO: "Bully." I was watching "Permanent Midnight" but grew tired of it and turned on TV. I've seen "Bully" now about 8 or 9 times and each time I see it.... I used to hate Rachel Miner, but the more I watch it, she grows on me. I realized tonight she reminds me of this girl I used to know, Misty. Looks like her, talks like her, the whole kit and caboodle. For those of you who haven't seen it, you must. It's disturbing, violent, sexually explicit, but that's not what makes it great. See for yourself. I'm pasting into this a paper I wrote on it a year ago for a film class. Hope you go out and see it.
Film Profile Three: Bully
Marty (Brad Renfro) and his “best friend” Bobby (Nick Stahl) work at a strip-mall sandwich place, where they meet Lisa (Rachel Miner) and Ali (Bijou Phillips). Marty and Lisa spend most of their time together and Lisa falls head-over-heels in love. Bobby dominates Marty, by pimping him to gay men for phone sex and strip shows, and Lisa and Ali, by raping them. Lisa sees Marty’s mental and emotional anguish and refuses to sit idly by. She, Marty, Ali and four other disaffected teens concoct a plan to murder Bobby and “get rid of everyone’s problem.” After some last-minute changes and an aborted attempt, they succeed. They carelessly clean up the murder and a few of the accomplices unravel to the point of destruction: they are convicted and sentenced for the crime. (132)
Bully deserves to be more widely seen because Larry Clark paints a vivid and horrific portrait of teenage dynamics that cannot be ignored. Along with his debut, Kids, Clark depicts teenage life as a wild, meandering, disenfranchised existence that no other filmmaker dares approach. Yes, this film is violent, vulgar and sexually explicit, but modern society has warped the taboo to become normal. Language no longer titillates, sex no longer shocks and violence is on prime-time television. But Bully takes each of these factors dangerously close to the edge, creating a society of youth disillusioned to the point where moral emptiness is prevalent and acceptable. The murder scene is disgustingly graphic, but necessary to depict the realism of the action. This is, after all, a true story. The sex is important to showcase the connection between Marty and Lisa, and the violation and humiliation felt by Lisa and Ali. Even more, the lurid sex demonstrates the involvement and commitment between these characters. These are kids with nothing but money and time; their cars and drugs are designer, yet they have no real jobs and surf all day. The gratuitous sex, drug use and violence serve to de-glamorize these teens, enforcing an image of a generation: listless, ambivalent consumers without real hope or ambition. This image feeds into their moral depravity and lack of appreciation for their actions. This film, unlike any I have seen before, typifies the feelings of many of the co-habitants of my era, showing us the antithesis of what we want to be, yet in some strange way something we cannot shake. This film is important because it is everything we hate mixed with everything that entertains us. The juxtaposition rudely knocks the Generation-Y viewer back to reality and causes a personal uproar about the society in which we live. (303)
Saturday, March 08, 2003
Thursday, March 06, 2003
Limp Bizkit: "Wish You Were Here" with Johnny Rzeznik
and Dispatch: "Out Loud"
Yesterday was Ash Wednesday (its late Wednesday night but it'll come up Thursday, so bear with me people) and it was a mixed day. I woke up at one, which was against my plan and didn't go to my classes again. But I decided to avoid feeling doubly guilty by missing ashes like I have the last I don't know how many years. I am Catholic (obviously) and went to nine years of Catholic school and I am ashamed to not know the slightest thing about my faith. I joke, I mock, but it really upsets me that I was not taught what I was supposed to learn at a Catholic school. Around 4th grade there was some kind of curriculum shakeup and we stopped going to church every Wednesday. We never discussed the Bible readings in Religion class, but I do remember learning about the damn Beatitudes every year. My parents never enforced church; my mom always said that she was perfectly able to speak and listen to God on her own in her way. And it got me out of going to church as a kid. To this day, I tend not to listen to the gospel; I glaze over what is going on and being said by habit. But today was a good day. I don't feel "born-again" or anything, but it was a good mass, in latin mainly, and it just made me think of what I liked about church in the first place. When I was a kid, I could recite every line the priest said in mass... the Catholic school boy trait. Now its all I can do to muster up an "and also with you" in the right place. I still mix up what is said before the first reading and before the gospel, and I never knew the Apostle's Creed. But Catholic, I am.
Matthew Good Band: "Middle Class Gangsters"
On a different note, supposedly George Walker Bush (as Don King says) went to bed Wednesday night to make his final decision by morning re: war in Iraq. So I guess that means it starts tomorrow. I've been reading a lot lately about this topic, in the Trib, Newsweek, US News, the Post, the Times, the Journal, all over, the Economist, National Review, the New Yorker, etc., etc., and what has struck me the most is that every source seems to support the war. Now, I've been for it almost since day one, but what surprises me is somewhat liberal newspapers and magazines are now onboard. Obviously it has become not a choice of go to war or not, but we're definitely going to war and are you on the side of freedom? Now, everyone is for peace and no one is for Saddam, but it has gotten to a certain point where our dicks are on the line and if we back down and leave Saddam in power, he wins and will take that as far as he can. He must be taken out now, and the only option is to invade. Now its about whether we do it alone, which would be horrible, or if other countries can wise up and join in, with manpower and money. The UN is proving useless, for while it was the best course of action at the time, the UN is in fact crumbling and if it doesn't stand up to Saddam like it threatened, it should collapse. Inspections are not working; you inspection supporters are blinded by the major victories in very minor areas. The al-Samoud missiles, while its good Saddam is disarming them, are simply the tip of the iceberg. He is playing the inspectors and the UN and the French and the Russians and the Chinese are letting him walk all over them. Bottom line: he must go, for hundreds of reasons, and it seems that popular concensus is coming around to that end. I just hope we dont go it alone, for that would be Walker's lowest point... we need the world's support on this. But if they're unwilling to sign on (I'm referring to Old Europe), we have to do what we have to do. It is a pressure cooker and time is running out, unfortunately. We can't fight in the Iraqi summer so the time is now. Pass the duct tape...DEVELOPING.
Ryan Adams: "Nuclear"
One more UN note. I am flummoxed at this. Flabbergasted. Libya (LIBYA!!!) is now the head of the UN Human Rights Commission. Are you fucking kidding me? Has Annan checked his Freedom House rankings lately? Or in the last 20 years? This is the result of a technicality in the system. The chairmanship rotates continent by continent and this year it's Africa's turn and they gave it to Qaddafi. They must be out of their minds. I know he's been acting better in America's interests so we'll lift the sanctions (which the UN did last year, though ours are still rightfully in place) but c'mon. My opinion, until the man who blew up Pan Am 103, amond many other atrocities) is out of power, Libya will never change, no matter what it looks like. The Human Rights Commission????? Wow.
Counting Crows: "Round Here"
Yesterday I took the Rorschach Test online and I failed. Granted the one I took was all in black and white and theyre normally in colors which makes it much easier to identify the interpretive shapes, but I would stare and stare and not get *anything* supposedly in there. I'd be like: "it looks like nothing" or "butterfly" for nearly every one. I know that psychiatrists laugh at the Rorschach Test these days, but it makes me sad that I couldn't even get one.
I watching Jimmy Kimmel Live tonight (yes, with the great Sarah Silverman as cohost) and he brought out a drug store Easter Basket, like at Walgreens for $4.99 or something and I'm not kidding, it had army men, candy, and a big giant fake gun. What kind of Easter Basket is that? I'm sure Jesus would approve. I mean the holiday is so commercial already, what with that damn Cadburry bunny (sidenote: I can't wait for those commercials again and those great treats, as well as the Reese's PB eggs... damn I love Easter candy) but c'mon... a gun in an Easter basket? Enough.
Night.
and Dispatch: "Out Loud"
Yesterday was Ash Wednesday (its late Wednesday night but it'll come up Thursday, so bear with me people) and it was a mixed day. I woke up at one, which was against my plan and didn't go to my classes again. But I decided to avoid feeling doubly guilty by missing ashes like I have the last I don't know how many years. I am Catholic (obviously) and went to nine years of Catholic school and I am ashamed to not know the slightest thing about my faith. I joke, I mock, but it really upsets me that I was not taught what I was supposed to learn at a Catholic school. Around 4th grade there was some kind of curriculum shakeup and we stopped going to church every Wednesday. We never discussed the Bible readings in Religion class, but I do remember learning about the damn Beatitudes every year. My parents never enforced church; my mom always said that she was perfectly able to speak and listen to God on her own in her way. And it got me out of going to church as a kid. To this day, I tend not to listen to the gospel; I glaze over what is going on and being said by habit. But today was a good day. I don't feel "born-again" or anything, but it was a good mass, in latin mainly, and it just made me think of what I liked about church in the first place. When I was a kid, I could recite every line the priest said in mass... the Catholic school boy trait. Now its all I can do to muster up an "and also with you" in the right place. I still mix up what is said before the first reading and before the gospel, and I never knew the Apostle's Creed. But Catholic, I am.
Matthew Good Band: "Middle Class Gangsters"
On a different note, supposedly George Walker Bush (as Don King says) went to bed Wednesday night to make his final decision by morning re: war in Iraq. So I guess that means it starts tomorrow. I've been reading a lot lately about this topic, in the Trib, Newsweek, US News, the Post, the Times, the Journal, all over, the Economist, National Review, the New Yorker, etc., etc., and what has struck me the most is that every source seems to support the war. Now, I've been for it almost since day one, but what surprises me is somewhat liberal newspapers and magazines are now onboard. Obviously it has become not a choice of go to war or not, but we're definitely going to war and are you on the side of freedom? Now, everyone is for peace and no one is for Saddam, but it has gotten to a certain point where our dicks are on the line and if we back down and leave Saddam in power, he wins and will take that as far as he can. He must be taken out now, and the only option is to invade. Now its about whether we do it alone, which would be horrible, or if other countries can wise up and join in, with manpower and money. The UN is proving useless, for while it was the best course of action at the time, the UN is in fact crumbling and if it doesn't stand up to Saddam like it threatened, it should collapse. Inspections are not working; you inspection supporters are blinded by the major victories in very minor areas. The al-Samoud missiles, while its good Saddam is disarming them, are simply the tip of the iceberg. He is playing the inspectors and the UN and the French and the Russians and the Chinese are letting him walk all over them. Bottom line: he must go, for hundreds of reasons, and it seems that popular concensus is coming around to that end. I just hope we dont go it alone, for that would be Walker's lowest point... we need the world's support on this. But if they're unwilling to sign on (I'm referring to Old Europe), we have to do what we have to do. It is a pressure cooker and time is running out, unfortunately. We can't fight in the Iraqi summer so the time is now. Pass the duct tape...DEVELOPING.
Ryan Adams: "Nuclear"
One more UN note. I am flummoxed at this. Flabbergasted. Libya (LIBYA!!!) is now the head of the UN Human Rights Commission. Are you fucking kidding me? Has Annan checked his Freedom House rankings lately? Or in the last 20 years? This is the result of a technicality in the system. The chairmanship rotates continent by continent and this year it's Africa's turn and they gave it to Qaddafi. They must be out of their minds. I know he's been acting better in America's interests so we'll lift the sanctions (which the UN did last year, though ours are still rightfully in place) but c'mon. My opinion, until the man who blew up Pan Am 103, amond many other atrocities) is out of power, Libya will never change, no matter what it looks like. The Human Rights Commission????? Wow.
Counting Crows: "Round Here"
Yesterday I took the Rorschach Test online and I failed. Granted the one I took was all in black and white and theyre normally in colors which makes it much easier to identify the interpretive shapes, but I would stare and stare and not get *anything* supposedly in there. I'd be like: "it looks like nothing" or "butterfly" for nearly every one. I know that psychiatrists laugh at the Rorschach Test these days, but it makes me sad that I couldn't even get one.
I watching Jimmy Kimmel Live tonight (yes, with the great Sarah Silverman as cohost) and he brought out a drug store Easter Basket, like at Walgreens for $4.99 or something and I'm not kidding, it had army men, candy, and a big giant fake gun. What kind of Easter Basket is that? I'm sure Jesus would approve. I mean the holiday is so commercial already, what with that damn Cadburry bunny (sidenote: I can't wait for those commercials again and those great treats, as well as the Reese's PB eggs... damn I love Easter candy) but c'mon... a gun in an Easter basket? Enough.
Night.
Monday, March 03, 2003
Blessid Union of Souls: "Walking Off The Buzz"
Listening to this amazing song that brings me back to my happiest days, and yes my screen name is inspired from this title. It was my #1 song at the time and it had a certain ring to it I must admit. What I didn't know was that "Buzz" would become intricately related to me that year, with The Buzz Cafe reaching unheralded prominence in my life and other reasons. Damnit I'm still in "professional writing mode" since I just wrote a retirement message for someone from my high school days.
That message has me thinking back to those last two years of high school. It's such a funny mechanism, memory. With time only the good things come forward. The times you wished you'd forget, you do tend to forget and everything starts coming up roses. I'm not complaining, since I would rather only remember the good times, but it's just funny. I had such a great time those two years. The people I was immersing myself with were the right people, the ones that stick, and the ones you want to stick. My first two years were peopled by comers and goers... there was no consistency. But then I went to North Campus and I made a conscious decision to start anew, to grow up. I was just talking with Mary about it and I voiced what I'd been thinking for awhile. I was so incredibly ballsy then and somehow I let myself become more of a caricature though I put up a damn good face sometimes. I'm not unhappy persay, but the great times are fewer and farther between. There was such an immediacy then that I wish was now, but everything is so much more relaxed. I guess I just have to accept how things are now and find my groove within *that*.
This weekend kinda sucked. I slipped Friday back into what I didn't want to. I went to that concert Thursday and to Murphy's afterward and though I wasn't drunk or hungover or anything at all, I slept in and didn't go to my two classes again. It doesn't matter attendance wise, but I just feel guilty and I hate that feeling. I am going to start out this week by going to all my classes day by day. I can make it work, I just have to be committed.
I went to my friend Allie's boyfriend's party last night and it was really great catching up with her, who I haven't seen in about a month. We decided to in a few weeks when we have some money to try a new local restaurant out for lunch every now and then. We both are woefully undercultured with Chambana and what better way than to try the local cuisine. We are gonna start with Radio Maria, a place that on their ever changing menu I saw African, South American and Mexican dishes mixed with normal, American and European ones. Sounds eclectic.
Today I tried to kick off the remnants of winter by putting in a cd that I associate with Spring. I put Collective Soul's "Disciplined Breakdown," which is my ultimate April cd and gave it a go. Well, when I left the grocery store and turned my car on to listen, it began to fucking snow. So I had to turn off the music because I can't risk mixing seasons. It's just too dangerous.
Some of you might say, well, Jeff, the cd you're listening to right now is part of your summer collection. And yes, reader, it is. But I am in my room on my computer, warm from the central heat and cannot see any snow. Weather is not a condition and only when it is is it risky to mix seasons. So there. Proved you wrong.
I have some more emailing to do before I tuck in for the night, so I'm gonna end this post here. I just want to throw a shout-out to Jackie in WI, who apparently feels underloved by Illinois people. Though she talks strangely, she's good people, so I salute her. And Christine, if you're reading this, check your voicemail already. Night.
Listening to this amazing song that brings me back to my happiest days, and yes my screen name is inspired from this title. It was my #1 song at the time and it had a certain ring to it I must admit. What I didn't know was that "Buzz" would become intricately related to me that year, with The Buzz Cafe reaching unheralded prominence in my life and other reasons. Damnit I'm still in "professional writing mode" since I just wrote a retirement message for someone from my high school days.
That message has me thinking back to those last two years of high school. It's such a funny mechanism, memory. With time only the good things come forward. The times you wished you'd forget, you do tend to forget and everything starts coming up roses. I'm not complaining, since I would rather only remember the good times, but it's just funny. I had such a great time those two years. The people I was immersing myself with were the right people, the ones that stick, and the ones you want to stick. My first two years were peopled by comers and goers... there was no consistency. But then I went to North Campus and I made a conscious decision to start anew, to grow up. I was just talking with Mary about it and I voiced what I'd been thinking for awhile. I was so incredibly ballsy then and somehow I let myself become more of a caricature though I put up a damn good face sometimes. I'm not unhappy persay, but the great times are fewer and farther between. There was such an immediacy then that I wish was now, but everything is so much more relaxed. I guess I just have to accept how things are now and find my groove within *that*.
This weekend kinda sucked. I slipped Friday back into what I didn't want to. I went to that concert Thursday and to Murphy's afterward and though I wasn't drunk or hungover or anything at all, I slept in and didn't go to my two classes again. It doesn't matter attendance wise, but I just feel guilty and I hate that feeling. I am going to start out this week by going to all my classes day by day. I can make it work, I just have to be committed.
I went to my friend Allie's boyfriend's party last night and it was really great catching up with her, who I haven't seen in about a month. We decided to in a few weeks when we have some money to try a new local restaurant out for lunch every now and then. We both are woefully undercultured with Chambana and what better way than to try the local cuisine. We are gonna start with Radio Maria, a place that on their ever changing menu I saw African, South American and Mexican dishes mixed with normal, American and European ones. Sounds eclectic.
Today I tried to kick off the remnants of winter by putting in a cd that I associate with Spring. I put Collective Soul's "Disciplined Breakdown," which is my ultimate April cd and gave it a go. Well, when I left the grocery store and turned my car on to listen, it began to fucking snow. So I had to turn off the music because I can't risk mixing seasons. It's just too dangerous.
Some of you might say, well, Jeff, the cd you're listening to right now is part of your summer collection. And yes, reader, it is. But I am in my room on my computer, warm from the central heat and cannot see any snow. Weather is not a condition and only when it is is it risky to mix seasons. So there. Proved you wrong.
I have some more emailing to do before I tuck in for the night, so I'm gonna end this post here. I just want to throw a shout-out to Jackie in WI, who apparently feels underloved by Illinois people. Though she talks strangely, she's good people, so I salute her. And Christine, if you're reading this, check your voicemail already. Night.
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